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Breaking Free Part 2, Lesson 3: What to Look For

Key text: Proverbs 31:30 (KJV)

Authorized Sword Ministries

Audio narrated with an AI voice. Read along below.

Hello, friend. Welcome to Authorized Sword Ministries.

We're so glad you're here.

Where We Left Off

In Lesson Two we learned to marry "only in the Lord." Today is Lesson Three. It's called "What to Look For in a Godly Man and a Godly Woman." We'll look at both, side by side.

Our Key Verse

"Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised."
— Proverbs 31:30 (KJV)

Looks fade. Character lasts. That's true for men and women alike.

A Godly Woman

Proverbs 31 describes a virtuous woman. She's trustworthy, hardworking, generous, and wise.

"Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies."
— Proverbs 31:10 (KJV)
"The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil."
— Proverbs 31:11 (KJV)
"She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life."
— Proverbs 31:12 (KJV)
"She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy."
— Proverbs 31:20 (KJV)
"She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness."
— Proverbs 31:26 (KJV)

Peter says her real beauty is on the inside.

"But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price."
— 1 Peter 3:4 (KJV)

Titus 2 tells older women to teach younger women to love their husbands and children, to be discreet, chaste, and good (Titus 2:3-5).

A Godly Man

Ephesians 5 tells a husband how to love.

"Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;"
— Ephesians 5:25 (KJV)

Peter tells husbands to honour their wives.

"Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered."
— 1 Peter 3:7 (KJV)

Paul's list for church leaders in 1 Timothy 3 is written for bishops, not for every husband. But as an application, it's a good picture of godly character in any man:

"A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, vigilant, sober, of good behaviour, given to hospitality, apt to teach;"
— 1 Timothy 3:2 (KJV)
"Not given to wine, no striker, not greedy of filthy lucre; but patient, not a brawler, not covetous;"
— 1 Timothy 3:3 (KJV)
"One that ruleth well his own house, having his children in subjection with all gravity;"
— 1 Timothy 3:4 (KJV)

"No striker." "Not a brawler." "Patient." A man who hits or rages fails this list. Titus 2 also tells young men to be "sober minded" (Titus 2:6).

What Both Should Have

Some qualities are for everyone. Look for the fruit of the Spirit in anyone you'd marry.

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,"
— Galatians 5:22 (KJV)
"Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law."
— Galatians 5:23 (KJV)

And both husband and wife are told to submit one to another in the fear of God (Ephesians 5:21).

Look at How They Treat Others

"Even a child is known by his doings, whether his work be pure, and whether it be right."
— Proverbs 20:11 (KJV)

That verse speaks of a child, and as an application it's true of adults too. Watch how a person treats their parents, waiters, coworkers, and people who can do nothing for them. That's who they'll be at home.

Closing Thought

Look for faith, character, and the fruit of the Spirit, in a man or a woman. Next time, in our last lesson, we'll look at the red flags to watch for before you say "I do."

Let Us Pray

Father, make us the kind of man or woman these verses describe, and help us recognize godly character in others. In Jesus' name, amen.

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